


Cerulean Tears and Love the shade of Shamrock

by Flygon_Master



Series: The Colors of Our Love make a Rainbow Riptide [1]
Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Crying, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Family Dynamics, Fluff, Gem Kisses, Insecurity, reunited
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-28
Updated: 2019-01-28
Packaged: 2019-10-18 06:46:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,976
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17575904
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Flygon_Master/pseuds/Flygon_Master
Summary: Peridot deserved explanations, she deserved fountains of apologies to spring from Lapis’ mouth, she deserved so much more than that singular word…and yet for the second time Lapis failed to convey her thoughts and emotions and instead took the easy way out...





	Cerulean Tears and Love the shade of Shamrock

“…and Tourmaline Facet-36J2-N Cut-13P! Alright we’ve reached maximum capacity, all remaining gems please move to the next dropship!”

The sound of several gems shouting their compliance could be heard as Bismuth directed a pleased smile at the archaic looking Earth tech in her hand. While the ‘megaphone’ as Steven had called it was nothing too impressive, with very few utilities outside of its one major function, it was rather handy to have in such a situation. Perhaps she would try to make a gem worthy equivalent once she got back…

“So are you really gonna go back with them to Homeworld?” The somber sound of Steven’s usually happy voice and the feeling of the small hybrid latching onto her leg drew Bismuth from her musings to glance down at him with a smile.

“Aw don’t look at me like that Steven, it’s not like I’ll be gone a long time.” Bismuth chuckled as she bent over to pull him up into a hug. “We need to get these gems back to Homeworld, Earth just doesn’t have the means to check them for any lingering abnormalities and since many of these gems fought against Homeworld…” Bismuth trailed off as she looked at the smaller being in her arms and waited for him to finish her thought, as the two had been over this before.

“They will be scared since the last thing they remember is Homeworld shattering them…I know you have to go to help all of them, but I will miss you.” Steven said with a watery smile as he hugged the larger gem once again this time around her neck.

“I’ll miss you too lil’ buddy, once we get everyone checked out and fully reformed I’ll come right back with any of the gems who can’t stand staying on Homeworld.” Bismuth chuckled as she looked over her shoulder at the Yellow Pearls waiting anxiously for her to start loading the remaining gems.

Steven caught her gaze and smiled softly at the Pearls, who blushed at his gesture and averted their eyes. Wiggling free from Bismuth’s hold Steven jumped to the ground and offered the larger gem one more goodbye, which she accepted before heading over to where the once corrupted gems were all lining up.

“Hey runt.”

Steven turned to find Jasper now towering over him, arms crossed and her face contorted into a tight scowl. If her overall demeanor had caused Steven any unease he didn’t show it as his face broke into a bright smile as he tackle hugged the warrior gem’s leg.

“Hey Jasper! How are you feeling?” Steven asked innocently, laughing lightly at the bewildered sound Jasper made before she shook him off her leg.

“I feel fine! I’m a quartz after I...” Jasper huffed angrily, bristling slightly at the unsaid implications that she wouldn’t be able to handle healing from the corruption any better than an average Anglesite or Morganite. Although, her shoulders slacked slightly as she looked at the small hybrids face to find genuine concern and caring. “…’m fine Steven.”

Steven smiled brightly at her once again. “I’m glad to hear it! What was it that you wanted form me Jasper?” The boy asked, same gleaming smile never leaving his face.

“I want you to come with me. I want to…” Jasper trailed off again as she glanced over her shoulder slightly at something Steven couldn’t see since Jasper’s massive form was currently taking up his entire line of sight. “I want to speak with the Lapis Lazuli, but without you I’m afraid she will…”

Nodding slowing Steven felt his smile slowly shift to one that held a more caring and sympathetic air to it. He knew it was going to be hard for the two gems to make up after everything that had happened between them, but from what little emotion he could see in Jasper’s eyes as she stared at Lapis from over her shoulder he knew that at least Jasper was ready to try.

“Don’t worry Jasper Lapis won’t hurt you, she is super nice once you get to know her!” Steven cheered happily as he wrapped his hand around one of Jasper’s large fingers and began dragging her towards where Lapis stood.

Jasper huffed indignantly. “I’m not scared of her, just don’t want her running away.” Steven could hear the small waver in her voice as she tried to act like the big mean gem they had all taken her for. He didn’t believe her and still held to his instinctive belief that the quartz solider was actually a big teddy bear, but he decided not to tell her that.

Lapis was laughing lightly at something Amethyst had just said when she caught a glimpse of the small half gem, raising her hand to beckon him over Lapis felt herself seize up at the realization of who the large gem was that Steven was leading closer.

Amethyst and Pearl took a few small steps back as Steven and Jasper came to a stop a few feet from where the trio had been standing. Steven looked over at Lapis with a happy and supportive smile, before looking up at Jasper with the same expression, nudging her arm lightly.

Jasper almost growled, the tension in the air eating away at her sanity. She was the one who wanted this however so with a deep breath Jasper pulled her gaze up to lock eyes with the water gem. “Look, most gems would do anything for their diamond, Pink- I thought Rose Quartz had- I was so consumed by blind hate and the need for petty revenge I-” Jasper grumbled, finding it difficult to speak the right words despite having been going over it in her head for hours now, ever since she had been filled in on what had happened since her corruption.

“It wasn’t petty.” Lapis said suddenly, confusing Jasper quite thoroughly with the conviction she spoke with. “You loved Pink Diamond, probably more so than any other quartz under her command. I know thanks to…Malachite.”

The air seemed to cool around them as Lapis choked out the name of their fusion. Jasper wanted to yell, she wanted to rampage and break things, but in the end all she could do was stand there and glare at the ground between the two feeling naked and exposed due to Lapis’ words.

“Lashing out due to love isn’t petty Jasper.” Lapis seemed to be mostly unaffected by the tension surrounding them as she continued to speak in a calm and level tone. “You did some pretty messed up stuff, but it was my fault we even…in the first place. I was so used to being locked away that I thought it would be the best answer to…” Lapis felt her confidence wavering as her own gaze drifted to the ground as well.

“I get it you know. You wanted to keep me away from him, I wouldn’t listen and you were out of other ideas…” Jasper spoke softly as she brought a hand up to her face to brush a small tear out of her eye. It was her sudden hearty laugh that seemed to snap the tense silence that had settled in the air as the other four gems standing next to her jumped slightly at the sudden sound.

“I forgive you, you know? I stopped holding it against you a while ago.” Lapis said, her own small laugh accompanying Jasper own slowly dying chuckles.

“I appreciate the sentiment and while there is nothing to forgive, I suppose I will extend the same gesture.” Jasper said with a final laugh, her surly grin failing to hide the self-loathing that seemed to consume her from within.

“I promise you didn’t hurt me nearly as bad as I ended up hurting myself and I’m assuming the same is true for you as well.” Lapis said with an uncharacteristic softness to her tone as she reached her hand out and took a single step forward, only to freeze in place at the sound of Bismuth calling for Jasper to make her way back to the dropship. “You need to forgive yourself Jasper…come back to Earth with Bismuth, me and Steven will show you all kinds of cool Earth stuff.”

Jasper snorted as she spun on her heels. “Forgive myself huh…” Jasper mused as she patted Steven’s head before walking in the direction of the final dropship. After a few steps Jasper paused and glanced back of her shoulder. “How were you able to find forgiveness for yourself Lazuli?”

Lapis smiled a small wistful smile as she averted her gaze to a small group of gems standing in a circle, raptly attentive to whatever was at the center of their little huddle. “I had help…”

Jasper turned her attention towards the group as well, briefly able to catch a glimpse of green and yellow causing a grin to break out onto her face. “Of all the gems you could have picked, you chose that one huh?” Jasper mused with a barking laugh. “Good choice…”

Lapis merely turned her gaze back to Jasper and watched her retreating form silently as if in a trance, until she felt Pearl’s hand rest gently on her shoulder. Lapis shook her head to clear it of past memories, both good and bad, so she could focus on the present which included addressing Pearl’s tentative expression.

“How are you doing Lapis?” Pearl finally asked once she noticed Lapis had fully come out of her thoughts.

“Fine Pearl, I came to terms with my feelings about Japer a while ago. Sure it was a bit of a shock at first to see her again, but it really wasn’t anything to get worked up over.” Lapis answer truthfully, her sincere tone and smile seeming to put Pearl at ease for a moment before her expression slipped back into one of concern.

“How are things between you and…Peridot?” Pearl asked pensively, her hand never leaving Lapis’ shoulder in what Pearl hoped was a comforting and reassuring gesture.

“Yeah she has been like mega-bummed since you took off.” Amethyst added, wincing slightly at the glare Pearl leveled her with as soon as the words had left her mouth.

Lapis laughed a bit ruefully, having missed the other gems to some degree despite having claimed in the past she did not much care for their presence. It almost felt like she was home…almost…

“We reformed almost at the same time, she was just a few minute ahead of me, Bismuth told us the situation you guys were in and well…” Lapis took a shuddery breath in before continuing, only barley registering Pearl rubbing soothing circles on the small of her back. “We only really had saving you guys on our minds and once we fixed the Diamond’s ships we were off so-” A small hiccup escaped Lapis’ lips as she fell to her knees to wrap her arms around Steven.

“She’s been avoiding me since we got back. I don’t know what to do or how to apologize.” Lapis said with a shaky voice as she buried her face into Steven’s hair, trying her hardest not to break down in front of them.

She regretted leaving more than she had ever regretted anything else in her entire life, but how could she show that to Peridot? How could she express just how sorry she was if Peridot wouldn’t even come close enough for Lapis to shout at her let alone apologize?

Amethyst kicked a nearby rock away with her feet, her expression was one of sympathy and yet she had no idea how to act on the feeling to comfort the water gem. Pearl had gone into hover mom mode and began to fidget about, looking around as if the answer to comforting Lapis would simply be sitting somewhere near them. However, it was Steven who finally broke the silence as he pulled away from Lapis’ grasp.

“I have a plan, I’ll go get those gems away from Peridot and you can take that opportunity to go apologize!” Steven said happily, a look of determination and support set on his face as she took off towards the small group of gem several yard away.

Lapis had called for him to come back, but due to her efforts to hold back her tears her voice didn’t have near enough volume for him to hear her. So instead she slowly rose from her knees to follow after him.

“…and then I- Oh! Hello Steven, I was just about to finish informing these gems about our efforts to stop the Cluster from destroying the planet! Is there anything that you would like to add?” Peridot asked with large toothy grin as she directed her attention away from the group of era ones and towards the shorter boy.

“Oh yeah! Although, it should probably be while we head back towards the dropship since Bismuth is just about done loading everybody onboard.” Steven said excitedly before flashing Peridot a small sympathetic smile, knowing how much fun Peridot was having talking ( ** _bragging_** ) to the newly reformed era ones.

“Ah…” Peridot said a little morosely before her spirits seemed to spring back up as she directed her attention back to the group. “I suppose the rest of my stories will have to be put on hiatus for now, just remember to be yourselves and not to let Homeworld push you around! Tell them they will have to mess with me if they do!”

Steven gave Peridot a big smile as he pulled her into a quick hug before turning to usher the era one gems off towards Bismuth. Noticing Lapis was still nervously lagging a few feet away he turned back to Peridot and added a swift ‘wait right there’ before shooting the water gem and encouraging smile.

Lapis watched as Peridot waved goodbye to the group of gems and it wasn’t until they were completely out of earshot that Lapis picked up her pace. Steven had given her the opportunity to talk to the younger gem…to apologize…and Lapis didn’t want to waste his efforts.

That didn’t stop her head from spinning nor did it stop the sickly feeling rising up in her chest. Was she truly ready to face Peridot? After everything that happened…could she really just say she was sorry? She should have prepared something beforehand, written an apology down or something so she could have planned out what she needed to say…

Lapis could kick herself, but it was no use thinking about that now. For the first time since they had returned to Earth Peridot was finally almost within arm’s reach…

Clearing her throat did little to help strengthen her voice as she had hoped, but it did gather Peridot’s attention and once their eyes met Lapis felt her chest seize up as she meekly squeaked. “Peridot…”

Lapis cursed at how weak her voice sounded, how it seemingly gave up after only uttering one word out of the thousands she needed to say.

“Lazuli.” Peridot responded flatly, her voice lacking any of the passion or excitement she normally spoke with. The bright smile that had seemingly taken over her face now replaced with a frown tightly pursing her lips…her whole demeanor reminded Lapis of the time when they weren’t close…the time that they were nothing more than informant and guard…

It scared her to think of Peridot in that way again…

“Hey.” Lapis winced as the word slid gracelessly out of her mouth and practically fell onto the ground between them with a heavy thud. Peridot deserved explanations, she deserved fountains of apologies to spring from Lapis’ mouth, she deserved so much more than that singular word…and yet for the second time Lapis failed to convey her thoughts and emotions and instead took the easy way out.

It was the worst start to this conversation and judging by the way Peridot’s face tightened Lapis knew she needed to act fast if she was going to salvage this attempt to apologize. “No, I meant-” Lapis quickly started again, but Peridot raised a hand between them and cut her words off cold in her mouth.

“What do you want to say Lazuli? That you’re sorry? Well, I don’t want to hear it!” Peridot snapped angrily, still holding her hand up palm facing Lapis as a signal that she didn’t want the taller gem to speak to her.

Lapis took a shuddery breath before taking a single step forward, choosing to ignore Peridot’s silent demand for her silence in what she feared was a vain attempt to show the smaller gem just how sorry she was. “Please, Peridot just-”

“Just **_WHAT_** Lazuli? You want to apologize, then what? Is everything supposed to just go back to normal between us? Are we going to take the fractured remains of **_OUR_** barn and **_OUR_** Meep Morp’s and simply rebuild the life we had before **_YOU_** threw it all away!?” Peridot shouted angrily, her hands balling into fists as she threw them down at her sides.

Lapis’ mouth snapped shut as her own outstretched hand balled into a fist, although unlike Peridot’s her hand wasn’t closed in rage, but instead a knee jerk reaction to the sudden emotional drop she felt in her stomach.

“Did you honestly think you could just show up after **_MONTHS_** of hiding, give a few paltry apologies and expect everything to be simply be **_FINE_**!? That’s not how it clodding works!” Peridot took a deep breath in and directed her anger filled gaze to the few feet of beach that separated the two.

Lapis stood frozen by Peridot’s words. Sure she hadn’t expected it to be easy to win the smaller gems forgiveness, but Lapis couldn’t deny she hadn’t thought there was a chance she wouldn’t receive it. It might have taken some compromises, maybe a plethora of promises and tears, but Lapis assumed eventually Peridot would forgive her.

Knowing that she may have lost Peridot for good caused her to feel sick to her very core.

“Do you even have any idea how **_HARD_** this whole thing has been for me!?” Peridot’s gaze snapped up as she gestured around them wildly. “I was top of my cut! An elite gem, heralded as one of the smartest era two peridots! The agates in charge of me had nothing but praises to say when it came to my personal reviews! It was why I was put in charge of the clodding Cluster project in the first place!”

Peridot’s hands found their way into her hair, tugging forcefully on the fluffy mass in frustration as she began to stomp her feet mid rant. Lapis wanted to stop her, try and put the smaller gem at ease, but the fiery glare she received when she made a move to step closer froze her in place once more.

“From the time I emerged until I stepped foot on this stupid planet all I had ever known were the Diamonds and their rules! I was the perfect gem, I was always obedient and I always completed my task without fail!” Peridot grinded her teeth in frustration as she pointed up at the temple. “Then out of nowhere I find myself not only failing to complete my task, but running for fear of losing my existence to a faction of clodding rebel gems I didn’t even know still existed!”

It hadn’t taken very long into Peridot’s sudden rage filled screaming for the other gems to notice the commotion. Steven and Bismuth leading most of them away towards the ship, however Garnet, Pearl and Amethyst stayed close by just in case they were needed to break up any sort of fight that might have broken out between the two.

The trio frowned at the words Peridot had used, never having been a fan of the term ‘rebel gems’ and especially not liking how it sounding coming from a gem they thought was their close ally and friend. It was a hand placed on Amethyst and Pearl’s shoulders that drew the sour look from their faces, Garnet muttering something about Peridot just being upset and not meaning to be hurtful.

Lapis and Garnet briefly made eye contact, an expression of sorrow shared between them over the small green gem, before Peridot’s rage fueled rant continued and drew their attention back to her.

“Everything I had been told was a **_LIE_**!” Peridot screeched as she roughly kicked the sand under her feet, before pausing for a moment to take a deep unneeded breath. “Steven showed me…Pearls aren’t just accessories for ‘better’ gems, fusions aren’t filthy war machines, quartz can be witty and fun…peridots aren’t just tools…”

The air around them seemed to cool as Peridot’s voice shifted from one of intense anger to something far more melancholic and self-loathing.

“Learning how to act by Earth standards was hard…is hard…I still struggle with many of the concepts and ideas. I sometimes think how lucky I am that Steven pitied me long enough to keep me around until I could learn how to act in a way the Crystal Gems found acceptable. Amethyst would have kept me around due to finding my ineptitude with Earth culture amusing, but I’m sure Pearl and Garnet would have shattered me had Steven not stepped in and assured them I was no threat.”

Peridot brought a hand to her face and quickly wiped at her eyes, unwilling to allow herself to cry in front of Lapis. Hearing Lapis begin to move forward once again Peridot shot her another piercing glare, efficiently pinning the water gem in place once more.

“I did everything I thought I had too, played by the rules set before me and even then I still couldn’t stop my continuous stream of failures. I thought I beat Pearl in an engineering competition and yet she won the praise and the high fives…I learned my lesson about saying things others found hurtful and yet I still couldn’t prevent getting laughed at…I even failed at fusing with the universes most perfect fusion…I was nothing but a clodding failure…until you came along.”

Lapis felt her chest hitch and even though her breath was unneeded she found herself desperately trying to get the air to cycle in and out as it had been doing feely mere seconds prior. Lapis found herself drawn in by the sardonic expression in Peridot’s eyes, wishing she could say or do something, anything to comfort the small gem. Sadly she found her form to be next to useless as even though her mind screamed at her legs to move they simply stayed still, leaving her to gap wordlessly and staring into the younger gems glassy eyes.

“You hated me and not even Steven could convince you otherwise. You rejected every apology, threw every present I gave you back in my face…you made it very clear you didn’t and wouldn’t trust me…and yet I feel like we got really close. Sure it wasn’t perfect, but we made it work. I wasn’t alone anymore, now I had another gem to learn with…to share experiences with…to break free of Homeworld once and for all, to become the gems Steven saw us as.”

Tears began to fill the corners of Peridot’s eyes and no matter how quickly Peridot wiped them away there always seemed to be more that had taken their place. Lapis’ lip quivered as tears of her own began to drip down her cheeks, which only seemed to cause more tears to bubble up in Peridot’s own eyes.

“I showed you Camp Pining Hearts, you read to me from your beauty magazines…we grew Earth crops…we had Pumpkin…I tried to learn everything about you. When you wanted to be left alone, when you were lonely…I tried so hard to make sure you were happy…I was happy making you happy…and then the one time I voice a differing opinion…”

Peridot couldn’t stop the torrent of tears that quickly began to overrun her face. Though she couldn’t be faulted for not trying, her hands were constantly wiping at her eyes and cheeks as she did her best to hold onto her ever diminishing composure.

“I loved my Diamond with everything I was and when I spoke my mind about saving the Earth she threw me away without a second thought like I was worthless! I thought you were different, I believed you were different!” Peridot sobbed, fully losing what little composure she had left as she broke down into heart wrenching wails. “You threw me away too because I’m a worthless Peridot who means nothing to anyone!”

That was the last straw and in just a few seconds Lapis had her arms wrapped around the smaller gem, gently cradling her crying form as close to her projection as she could. Her hands finding their way into Peridot’s hair, combing gently through the fluff of blonde in a soothing manner as Lapis quietly began whispering hushing sounds into the younger gems shoulder.

“NO! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! **_I HATE YOU_**!” Peridot screamed as she pounded her fists weakly on Lapis’ shoulders, trying her best to escape the water gems grasp but finding it impossible due to her emotional fatigue. After a moment Peridot instead pressed her face into the crook of Lapis’ neck, losing herself to her tears and Lapis’ comforting touch.

Garnet had to tighten her grip on Pearl’s shoulder as the slim gem failed to fight off her urge to run up and hug the two crying gems. Pearl was muttering apologies and comforting words as she struggled to get free from Garnet feeling absolutely awful that she hadn’t noticed their small companion’s apparent inner struggles.

Amethyst simply flopped down into a sitting position and crossed her arms, grumpily chastising herself for failing to help Peridot as well…that and her constant teasing of the small green gem despite how earnestly she was trying to adapt to their lifestyle.

The fusion stood still, her two halves lost in a discussion about the trio’s failings. Only able to watch and hope that Lapis was able to help Peridot where the three of them had seemingly failed.

Years seemed to pass in those few minutes, nothing but the sound of Peridot’s slowly fading sobbing to disturb the air around them. A small rustling of the younger gem brought Lapis from her stupor, letting her grasp go slack just enough for Peridot to push back so they could be face to face.

“I hate you…” Peridot mumbled grumpily, her voice sounding more tired than upset as her brows furrowed together in an attempt to look angry. Lapis thought she looked more adorably pouty, but she wasn’t about to say that right now.

“You have every right to hate me Peri.” Lapis said slowly, proud that there was only a small hitch in her voice as she spoke, as she continued to run her fingers through the younger gems hair…savoring the feeling for as long as she would be allowed.

Peridot shook her head hastily before shoving her face back into the crook of Lapis’ neck. “…I missed you so much you clod…please don’t leave me again...”

Lapis sucked down a ragged gasp of air as she squeezed the small gem in her arms as tightly as she could, as if this was some form of sick joke and Peridot would choose to flee from her as soon as she felt Lapis’ arms go slack.

Peridot missed her too…

Peridot wanted her to stay…

“Lapis you’re squishing me.” Peridot spoke with a soft teary giggle as she wiggled in Lapis’ grasp to try and relive some of the force of the crushing hug she found herself in.

Peridot…forgave her…?

“I’m so sorry for leaving Peridot…I’m so sorry, I don’t know how to tell you how much I missed you. How much I wanted to hear your silly little laugh and to watch you play with all the weird Earth stuff we would find near the barn.” Lapis spoke with a voice barley above a whisper as she practically smothered the younger gem, almost like she was trying to convey her jumbled mess of thoughts and emotions through touch alone.

Peridot squirmed a bit more under the pressure of Lapis hug, but made no move to escape Lapis’ arms nor did she raise her voice to interrupt the older gem. Something deep in her core told her to keep silent, so Peridot did just that as she cuddled deeper into the embrace and simply listened to whatever Lapis had wanted to say.

“How much I missed your adorable little tirades on Camp Pining Hearts, how your eyes would get so big and practically shine as we rewatched our favorite episodes. How much I missed how every new thing we discovered you treated as if it was the biggest deal in the whole universe. How much I missed singing and dancing together. How much I missed playing in our smaller than average lake. How much I missed forcing you to take naps with me and pumpkin…How much I missed…everything! I missed you so much Peridot, you mean so much to me and I was too stupid to see it until it was too late!”

Lapis broke down into harsh sobs as she twisted her fingers into the back of Peridot’s outfit, clutching onto Peridot tightly just to reassure herself that the green gem was still there and Lapis wasn’t back on the moon dreaming a bitter sweet dream that she would soon awaken from.

It took a moment for Lapis to notice the soft pressure she felt on her shoulders, but when she did she pulled back slightly and allowed Peridot to push the two apart. Quickly those same small hands found their way onto her face and were softly brushing the tears off of her cheeks. Peridot looked at Lapis with a small smile as her own tears trailed down her face, a small teal blush lighting up her cheeks.

“It’s not too late…you came back…you’re here now…I’m sorry I said all those mean things, I didn’t mean it…I don’t hate you, actually you mean quite a bit to me as well…” Peridot spoke with sincerity as she continued to wipe away Lapis’ tears until there were none left, the two just sat their sniffling staring into each other’s eyes.

Lapis waited for Peridot to continue as she could tell Peridot had something else she wanted to say, but when the words never came and the water gem saw a flicker of self-doubt flash through Peridot’s eyes Lapis decided she needed to squash those thoughts from progressing any further.

“Yeah you did say some stuff that wasn’t true…you’re not a worthless ‘peridot’ and you are most certainly not a worthless gem. I don’t know if all this hating on yourself started when I…left you…or if I was just too blind to see it, but I promise to spend every hour of every day from now on telling you how wonderful and special you are until you fully accept it.” Lapis huffed with a grin as she brought her hands up to smoosh Peridot’s damp cheeks. “That means you’re gonna have to finally accept that you are undeniably cute!”

Peridot’s reaction was exactly as Lapis had hoped…it was exactly as she had remembered…Peridot began squawking and shoving on Lapis’ shoulders, claiming up and down that she wasn’t cute and how Lapis should have just stayed in space. Lapis smiled at how little impact those words actually had and how Peridot’s fingers actually tightened around her wrists as she said it, a little safety precaution Lapis rightfully assumed.

Lapis leaned in and placed her lips on Peridot’s cheek, kissing her softly before blowing a raspberry into her skin causing Peridot to erupt into more indignant giggles. Lapis continued her assault blowing wet raspberries into Peridot’s cheeks, neck and arm with the younger gem squirming and complaining the entire time that her voice wasn’t preoccupied with giggling.

By the time Lapis finally relented the two had tears in their eyes of a completely different kind. Wiping her eyes quickly Peridot swiftly stood to her feet and smoothed out her outfit before clearing her throat awkwardly, small teal blush still resting on her cheeks.

“Well then I suppose this is good then…this is…” Peridot shifted on her feet as she fumbled for words, watching intently as Lapis rose from the ground as well to look down at Peridot with a fondness that the younger gem had never been on the receiving end of before.

“This is our fresh start…if you want it to be Peridot. I promise, I’m here for good now and I’ll never leave you again if you give me the chance to stay.” Lapis said with an almost shy smile, her affectionate tone and gaze causing Peridot to only blush harder as she stumbled for a response.

“Our fresh start...I’d like that! Okay, from now on you’re not allowed to go off planet without talking to me first! Or on several day long flights!” Peridot spoke quickly her whole demeanor reeked of embarrassment and Lapis could only chuckle at how cute she was.

“Okay, I promise.” Lapis grinned, feeling all the twisting turning emotions in her chest finally begin to ebb away as Peridot looked up at her with a big smile.

Peridot let out a small satisfied huff as most of the tension she was feeling visibly melted from her stance. “We should probably head back the othe-” Peridot never got to finish her thought as she felt a new set of arms wrap around her middle section from behind, pulling her into another tight hug.

“It was never pity…” Steven mumbled with a mixture of sadness and anger in his voice, although Peridot could tell the anger wasn’t being directed at her but was rather being pointed back at himself.

Peridot turned as much as she could to address Steven and caught a glimpse of the other three Crystal Gems, with Garnet releasing her grasp on Pearl as soon as Peridot met her gaze. Pearl was a whirlwind of hugs and tears and apologies, promising to keep a better eye on how Peridot was feeling while also chastising the smaller gem for apparently bottling herself up instead of coming to them for council.

Amethyst gave Peridot a reassuring squeeze to her shoulder, and the non-verbal promise that the two would have a heart to heart later, once Pearl was finally pushed away to fawn over Lapis for a bit.

Garnet placed a gentle hand on Steven’s back and with a bit of coaxing got the boy to fully release Peridot from his hug. “Peridot is emotionally and physically tired, she said somethings in the heat of the moment-” Garnet spoke to Steven gently, although loudly enough for the others to hear as well, before Peridot frantically cut her off.

“I wasn’t thinking clearly when I spoke! I truly didn’t mean to say anything negative about any of you and I am so-” Peridot tried to explain herself before Garnet returned the favor by cutting her off this time. Although not with words but instead by placing a caring and loving hand to the smaller gems head, patting her gently for a few moments before continuing her previous thought.

“Those things weren’t said with hate or malicious, but some of it was rather…telling…it’s easy to see that we have let our little fiend down in a big way.” Garnet spoke softly, quickly holding up a hand to cut Peridot’s retort off before it had the chance to leave her mouth.

“I think tomorrow we should all sit down and have a nice big discussion about everything that has happened and how we can proceed in the future.” Pearl said with a small sniffle, still trying to reign in her emotions.

“So we will talk about what Peridot said tomorrow after everyone has had a chance to sleep and rest up? I don’t want her to keep thinking that we didn’t like her or that she isn’t a valuable member of our team!” Steven complained to Garnet as if Peridot were not standing two feet from him.

Peridot made a small noise of protest before a rumbling chuckle Garnet filled the air. “Yes Steven, tomorrow we will talk all about it and we will even put it off for a few hours so you can draw up some diagrams and get some visual aids to show Peridot just how much we all love her.”

Steven cheered joyfully as Peridot made another startled and unhappy noise. Amethyst smiled deviously and threw her arm around Steven’s shoulders and began making plans about how they would put on whole song and dance about the ‘Cute and Adorable Peridot’ much to the green gems chagrin.

Once Steven and Amethyst were out of earshot Garnet stood up and placed her hand on Peridot’s head once more. “You are loved Peridot…I never would have shattered you, I was too strict and was a bit unforgiving, but I never even considered it.”

Peridot blushed a bright teal as her head was rubbed softly by the larger gem. “I know…” Peridot muttered with a frown, upset with herself for needlessly upsetting the others.

“I know you do.” Garnet smiled as she removed her hand from Peridot’s hair, quickly grabbing Pearl’s arm before walking both of them towards the temple. Pearl sputtered angrily about how it was unfair for Garnet to talk about it further and how she would be making Peridot a sleeping pallet in the living room instead of her usual place in the bathtub.

“I’m looking forward to tomorrow now, I wonder if I’ll get a part in the song and dance.” Lapis said teasingly as she lightly nudged the shorter gems shoulder. Peridot grumbled under her breath about how it was unneeded and how much of a clod she was for saying such things so loudly.  Lapis just rolled her eyes as she spun Peridot around to face her, placing a finger under the green gems chin to force her gaze upwards.

“I don’t need a song and dance to show me I’m l-l-loved…” The fact that Peridot stuttered out the last word while adverting her eyes was enough of a tell for Lapis to know that the younger gem probably did need a song and dance, maybe a whole parade even.

Peridot had helped Lapis find the strength to forgive herself…to love herself and to love others, but she had never returned the favor. Despite all her big talk about being the leader of the Crystal Gems and having found her place outside of Homeworld, it was obvious now Peridot still struggled mentally with being something more than just a ‘worthless peridot’.

Lapis knew it was her time to help Peridot forgive herself…love herself for the amazing little gem that she was…

“Hmm, even if that’s true what’s the harm? Steven will be happy so everything works out.” Lapis laughed as she took Peridot’s hand in her own and began leading her back towards the Temple.

“It will be embarrassing for sure! Not to mention I’m certain they will use that awful c-word too many times as well!” Peridot huffed, although Lapis caught the small smile that ghosted on her lips out of the corner of her eye.

“Can you blame them ‘Dot? I mean, look at your new form! Adorably cute.” Lapis said with a nod as if what she was saying was absolute fact and could be disproved by no one.

“I do not look cute I look cool and as some people online would say ‘badass’…whatever that means, but definitely cool, not cute!” Peridot grumped angrily as the two climbed up the stairs to the house.

Lapis let Peridot pass her for two steps before lightly tugging on her hand. Peridot paused her ascent and turned around to find herself now face to face with Lapis, causing the smaller gem to blush once again.

“You know what my favorite part about your new form is?” Lapis asked with a heavy breath, her eyes lidding slightly as she grinned hungrily at the smaller gem in front of her. However, her expression slowly began losing it sultry look and started growing slightly more amused with every passing second as she watched Peridot’s whole face get engulfed by her blush. “Easy access for gem kisses…”

Lapis whispered with the best ‘bedroom voice’ she could muster, despite being a few seconds away from busting out into a giggle fit, as she leaned in close and pressed her lips to Peridot’s gem.

It was warm, very warm and as Lapis pulled back a few inches she noticed that it had begun to glow slightly. Leaning back in, Lapis placed a second kiss to Peridot’s gem this one much longer than the first and only pulled back when she heard a small whimper fall from Peridot’s lips.

_“Her gem glows when she gets all hot-n-bothered. I can’t let her go in like that, what would Pearl say?”_

 Lapis smirked devilishly as she leaned in for the third time, her lips making contact with Peridot’s gem and-

“PPPPPPBBBBBBBBTTTT!”

“LAPIS YOU AWFUL- DON’T YOU RUN AWAY!” Peridot shouted angrily as she chased a hysterically laughing Lapis into the house.

Steven and Amethyst joined in the chase.

Pearl shouted at them to settle down.

Garnet chuckled from her spot on the couch.

_“Now this…this feels like home.”_


End file.
